Nigger: Just a Word, or Something More?

A Philadelphia Police Officer is in some hot water today thanks to racial comments he made while escorting a college student journalist. It brings to the fore a legitimate question: are words such as 'nigger', 'spic', 'gook', 'harp', 'nip', 'chink', 'fag' or 'gook' simply that, words, or are they more? I've heard this argument made any number of times, that these are just words, and if people are going to keep getting offended by words like 'nigger' then they are setting themselves up for a lifetime of taking offense. True enough in that any discussion on this issue, be it in the local newspapers, at the office water cooler, in an interview room at a police facility, on the internet, or in the halls of Congress or the United Nations is not going to change people's habits. It is not going to stop people from using these words, either in their most benign sense or their most derogatory. I have also heard the argument made that questions why, for instance, black people are so offended by the word 'nigger' when it is uttered by a white man or anyone from any other race, and yet they toss it around with ease among one another. 'Yo, he my nigger' or 'You one stupid nigger' or many other usages too numerous to mention come to mind. I have heard black people use these exact phrases among one another without anyone taking offense and without an eyebrow raised. For a long time in my life, I just didn't get it either. I thought that it was just another way for a black person to try to gain sympathy, to feign victimization by the white man, to play the race card. If I tried to list for you how many times in my life that I was called 'honkey' or 'whitey' or 'white boy' or 'cracker' or 'mick', it would fill a book. If I listed for you how many times those words offended me when used towards me, you could count those times on one hand. So I just didn't get it. Then one day about a dozen years or so ago I was involved in a conversation about this very topic with a fellow police officer who happened to be black. At the end of the conversation, I said to him "So your people can toss that word around all you want, can call one another 'nigger', can use it any way you want, but if I call you a 'nigger', that's wrong and you're offended?" His simple one-word response: "Exactly." Why it took a smart fella like me three decades of his life to understand a simple concept that was summed up by this cop's one word answer is fodder for another entire article. But the simple idea is this: some words offend people of ethnic, racial, or sexual groups. Period. They just do. And the fact is that those of us who may not be in their particular group will never, ever understand the emotions behind those feelings. But we don't need to understand the raw emotions. All we need to know is that these words offend, and so we should refrain from using them in most circumstances. So does that mean that we can never, ever use pejorative terms or slang words? No, of course not. Everything has its place. For instance, so far in this article I have used the word 'nigger' nine times, counting the headline and that last mention in this sentence. Using any word in a legitimate intellectual discussion is appropriate. There has been a major copout in today's society where people from Oprah to Obama use the phrase 'the N word' in public, but then aren't afraid to use 'nigger' in private conversations. Failing to use the word itself in an intellectual discussion helps to raise the word above it's meaning. It is the meaning that lies behind the word when used in a derogatory sense that releases its true negative emotional responses. This is particularly so when it is uttered by a member of one group that has historically been in a position of power and influence against some member of a group that has been historically deprived of that power. Now just because of my own personal enlightenment, don't take that to mean that I have never used the word 'nigger' in conversation, I have. And so has almost every single person who is reading this article: cop, lawyer, judge, politician, factory worker, businessman, whatever. It is one of the reasons that we all knew instinctively that Mark Fuhrmann was lying in the O.J. Simpson case. The man is a big city police detective and was asked if he ever used the word 'nigger', and replied that he had not. You might as well have painted a huge word 'LIAR' across his forehead in capital letters after that. He could have been, and probably was, telling the truth about most every other aspect of the case and his involvement. But no one was going to believe him after this point, particularly after the defense made a concerted effort to prove that he had lied about this issue. One thing that I can say for sure is that I have never used that word directly towards any black person, or in the presence of any black people, in any derogatory way. Even if I felt that I was in the presence of someone that I felt comfortable with and had no fear that they would take offense, I wouldn't use that word in that way simply out of respect. Now understand this, most cops are very comfortable around other cops. That thing about being white, black or yellow, but when the uniform is on we are all blue? That isn't just talk most of the time, that is how most cops genuinely feel. We toss around racial and sexual and other slang phrases and profanities among one another that would make a sailor blush. But we also know our place. We know when we are among friends, when we can let our hair down, and can toss around the bullshit without having to worry about anyone taking offense. The officer in the particular case that has broken in the local news was not among friends, and should have known better. He was driving a reporter around with him who was doing street-level research for a story that she was going to write. Was he trying to impress her in some way by acting tough and hard and macho? Who knows. Who cares. The fact is that this young rookie cop was stupid to make those comments to anyone, let alone a college journalism student writing for her newspaper. Now some would say that this officer should be off the police force simply for having those feelings. I disagree. We all bring a wide variety of personal experiences and backgrounds to this job. None of us can help the way that we were raised, what we were exposed to, or what was our 'normal' for a couple of decades before we ever considered police work as a profession. What we can do, however, is grow, mature, and learn how to set aside any personal prejudices and perform a professional job for all citizens, regardless of any background of theirs which may be different from our own. The young officer in question works in a tough area of North Philly, an area where he is exposed to a great deal of crime, hurt, pain, and even death on a daily basis. It is an area that is mostly black, and where most of the murder, drug dealing, and crime is perpetrated by blacks against other blacks. It is not hard to become jaded by all of that. For some white people who hear about blacks feeling oppressed by the 'man' or the 'system', that is a hard pill to swallow, that blacks in these areas expect more from us than they do of their neighbors. But they, and I believe the officer in this case, have it all wrong. Most of the people in that area are not bad people. They don't deal or use drugs. They don't rob folks. They don't expect more from white people, or the system, or the man, than they do from their neighbors. They expect their neighbors to treat them with courtesy and respect and perhaps even affection, and they have a right to expect these things. As always, it is the few who make it difficult for the many in these neighborhoods. There just happen to be more of those 'few' in that particular neighborhood for any number of reasons that are not the fault of those 'many'. So to white people everywhere, get it for once. You can't call a black person a 'nigger' at all. You can't use the term 'niggers' in regards to black people in any public discussion or forum where the term is being used in a derogatory manner. It doesn't matter how many times blacks use it among themselves, it is simply different, and you need to understand and respect that as a simple fact. The same goes for any other derogatory slang word for any other group as well. Words like 'nigger' are not just words, they are indeed something more.

A Heart That Plots Wicked Schemes

On this Sunday morning we continue the discussion of Proverbs 6:16-19 in the Bible which lists those things which the Lord hates. The fourth item in the list journeys deep into our hearts. Not our physical hearts, but those things which can be found at our very inner core - for each of us, the heart of the matter in all things that we consider in our lives. Those whom the Lord hates in this item are plotters and schemers of sin. Those who plan to do someone else ill. Those who plan to take what is not theirs. Those who intentionally and with malice aforethought actually take the time to sit down and think about their sin and how to make it happen. The man who sees a way to deceive his business partners of money, and then goes about the planning and execution of his embezzelment. A woman who feels the desire and sees an opportunity to steal the body and possibly even the heart of a man who is already married to another, and then begins to lay the bait for her seduction. The first human schemes occurred way back in the beginning of man himself. Eve used her seductiveness to get Adam to take a bite of the apple, the very act of defiance of God's will that drove man from paradise. She knew they were different, man and woman, for God had made them that way on purpose in order that they might procreate and populate the earth. Eve had been led into this plot by the whisperings of the great deceiver Satan, who had lied and manipulated her as only he can to pull man away from God. Eve knew that her feminine charms would be enough to coax Adam into the bite, and went about the task of using them for that very purpose. Soon after man was driven from the Garden of Eden for this defiance came the second human plot. Adam and Eve began to populate the earth when they gave birth to a pair of sons, first Cain and then Abel. Jealous of what he perceived to be favored attention towards his brother, Cain plotted in his heart against Abel saying to him: "Let's go out to the field", where Cain subsequently killed his own brother. It is the wickedness of sin that keeps man apart from God. What God is revealing to us in this fourth of the things He hates is the fact that while the commission of sin is bad enough, the person who thinks over a sin and then devises the means to make it happen is committing a separate, particularly evil act. Think of Mohamed Atta and the other terrorists who sat down together and devised the intricate plan to first hijack and then fly airliners into American buildings on September 11th, 2001. Think of O.J. Simpson gathering a face mask, leather gloves, and a large knife before driving to his estranged wife's home to murder her. Think of men like Andrew Fastow, Jeffrey Skilling and others involved in the Enron scheme to hoodwink the entire financial services industry during the 1990's. Think of any married man or woman who becomes sexually attracted to someone in their workplace or their neighborhood, and then begins to formulate a plan to begin a relationship with that person. Or a single person who does the same with another who is married. Think of the woman who learns that she is pregnant, and goes to the phone book to find an abortion clinic. Think simply of someone who, no matter the circumstances, allows a wedge to be driven in the relationship with their parents, and then intentionally perpetuates that heart-hardening. "Thou shalt not kill", "Thou shalt not steal", "Thou shalt not commit adultery", "Honor your father and mother" are all commandments given to man by God Himself. All are involved in the sins just mentioned. All involved some amount of plotting, planning, and scheming in order to make them happen. We have all done things like this during the course of our lives. Some who are reading this are taking actions such as this right at this very moment. You are continuing estrangement from your family. You are having an adulterous affair. You are taking things that do not belong to you. We are sinning in a way that God tells us is particularly hurtful to Him when we allow our hearts to be filled with such wicked plots. If you find that you are involved in any actions such as these, you need to put an end to your involvement in them immediately. If not, you just may find that your continued insistence on doing these things which God hates will end in a much worse way than you could ever imagine, either in this life or the next.
NOTE: This is the continuation of the regular 'Sunday Sermon' feature, each entry of which can be viewed by clicking in to that below label.

Arrogant & Ignorant...and Guilty as Sin

Orenthal James Simpson, the jury in this matter finds you guilty! Guilty, OJ! No smiles for you. No smirks this time. No look of shocked disbelief on your face that you had beaten the system. Thirteen years ago, former football star and celebrity O.J. Simpson got away with murder. I remember hearing the verdict well while most of America watched it on television. I couldn't see it because my then fiancee Debbie and I were driving home from an appointment involving our wedding, which would take place just four days from then. As the foreperson prepared to read the verdict we pulled over, and there somewhere around Cottman Avenue and Roosevelt Boulevard, sitting in our car, we heard those incredibly unjust words. Simpson had beaten the charges of murdering his ex-wife and another man. He had nearly decapitated the mother of his children, and had gotten away with it thanks to an incredibly inept prosecution and a high-powered, highly competent, and expensive defense team. The reactions to the verdict highlighted yet again the racial disparity of America. Almost to a one, white Americans saw the verdict for the true injustice that it was. A cold-blooded killer with a history of spousal abuse had finally killed the woman, and now a jury had let him off despite overwhelming evidence of his guilt. The large majority of black Americans instead cheered the verdict, not so much for any innocence of O.J. himself, but because, as they saw it, an African-American had beaten a justice system that many of them felt had wrongly convicted innumerable blacks over the course of its history. A black man had beaten the unjust system was how they saw it, and his own personal actions be damned. Of course that should be an embarrassing position for any black American to take, particularly any black woman who has ever been the victim of abuse and intimidation from a black man. In any event, Simpson got away with murder that day. However, a civil jury in a later court action found him appropriately liable for the killings, and choked off his financial resources. For his part, Simpson said that he would begin a search for "the real killers", and publicly set about said search on golf courses across America. He even had the unmitigated gall to write a book titled "I Did It" in which he described how he committed the murders. The courts rightly confiscated the book rights and turned them over to the families of the murder victims, and thus what was finally titled "If I Did It" was published, with proceeds going to the victim families. But Simpson himself continued to walk the golf courses of America for more than a decade as a free man. The case for which he was found guilty, a verdict that came down exactly 13 years to the day after his previous 'not guilty' verdict in the murder trial, was a separate incident. Simpson was loaded for bear with a handgun when he and some associates raided a Las Vegas hotel room in an effort to take items of sports memorabilia which he claimed were his own. The jury in this case found him guilty of robbery and related charges which included the weapons charges. This week, a judge sentenced the now 61-years old Simpson to between 9 and 33 years in prison. In admonishing him after the sentencing, she stated that she could not tell during the trial if Simpson was "arrogant or ignorant, or both" and stated that she now knew the answer. That answer, of course, was that he is both. The man known as 'The Juice' then squeezed out a few crocodile tears as he continued to proclaim his innocence. The fact of the matter is that O.J. Simpson is guilty as sin, and the fact that he was walking around for the last 13 years was a travesty of justice to Americans, an insult to the Brown and Goldman families, and an inexcusable spit on the graves of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman themselves. That the arrogant and ignorant criminal murderer finally tripped up in his life to the extent that he could not wiggle his way out of it finally begins to set things right. The two trials were unrelated, had nothing to do with one another, and yet it doesn't feel that way. It feels as if justice is finally being served. It feels as if a murderous killer who thumbed his nose at society is finally going to face the truth of a life behind bars that is the minimum he deserves. As Goldman's father said yesterday, the verdict will not bring Ron and Nicole back. But what it does is put a killer where he belongs, behind bars, and for a long time. Here is to hoping that he spends the rest of his life there before he has to stand before the ultimate judge at the end of his life. At that point, a billion Johnny Cochrane's won't help him escape final judgement.

The Juice is Not Loose

Have you ever known someone who got away with some extreme crime or a personally hurtful action and been frustrated and angry, but there was nothing you could do about it? You know, when you get that thought across your mind that "They will get what they have coming to them some day" or maybe you just believed that the person was so personally or professionally irresponsible by nature that they were bound to mess up again, or commit another crime, and that next time they wouldn't be so fortunate as to get away? Well, it has finally happened for those of us normal human beings as relates to the life and crimes of one Orenthal James 'O.J.' Simpson. The murderer who nearly decapitated his wife and the mother of this children, Nicole Simpson, and who overpowered and sliced up a young waiter, Ron Goldman, who was simply returning sunglasses to her, over a decade ago and got away with it won't be getting away with his latest crime. A jury in Las Vegas found Simpson guilty on a dozen charges, including armed robbery and kidnapping, and the two-time murderer, as a civil trial found him responsible for, will hopefully now spend the rest of his life behind bars. All those people who stood and cheered and applauded on that somber day in late summer of 1995 when Johnny Cochrane and his brilliant legal team put on a spirited, financially extravagent defense to free the murderer, are now sitting on their hands. Some of them are probably even thinking "they was gonna get him, they wasn't gonna let him get away, they wouldn't let him breath, etc." Fact is, no imaginary 'they' had to do anything to 'get' this particular murderer. Like most of them, all he needed was to be left out in the world long enough, and he was going to slip up again. Thankfully he slipped up so big that the rest of us, those who didn't care about race or anything other than finding justice for Nicole and Ron, finally have a measure of it. Simpson, known during his playing days as 'The Juice', is finally where he has belonged all along: behind bars. He no longer has to worry about scouring the nation's golf courses in an attempt to track down "the real killers." Unfortunately we are left with the same attitude as always among those who cheered his previous fortune. They continue to wail and cry when one member of their community murders another. They continue to defend their sons and brothers after they kill and maim and rob, consistently calling them a 'good boy' who just had some bad breaks in life. The fact is that people make their choices and have to live with the ramifications of those actions. Those around them need to stop accepting this when it is done over and over again, and need to hold them responsible whithin their families and communities. Should there be forgiveness for sins? Of course. Who among us hasn't made mistakes, some huge, in their lives? I certainly have. But I haven't murdered anyone, let alone two people, had tens of thousands cheer my release, and then walked around for over a decade flaunting that court room victory. The murderer is finally in the cage where belongs, where he can't murder or rob any more innocent citizens (not to mention family members), and likely he will remain there for the rest of his life. God will one day serve whatever ultimate justice He feels is appropriate for the murderer, but for now justice is served, and the Juice is no longer loose.

O.J. Simpson Vegas Trial Better Send in the Clowns

There's O.J. Simpson looking smug as a bug in a rug on the day of opening statements in his robbery and kidnapping trial. Simpson and co-defendant Charles "CJ" Stewart face a dozen charges that could theoretically send each to prison for life.

The case concerns a well-publicized Vegas hotel room scuffle wherein Simpson and friends allegedly held two memorabilia dealers captive using threats of bodily harm. Simpson claims he entered the room only to retrieve his own memorabilia and the situation quickly escalated out of control.

As expected, the trial offers soap opera drama writers can only dream about.

For one thing, Simpson entered the Vegas courtroom wearing the same cool and collected expression and beige suit as the days he waltzed into Los Angeles for the murder trial of ex-wife Nicole and her friend Ron Goldman.

For another, three of Simpson's five accomplices are convicted felons. Four of them plead guilty and agreed to testify for the prosecution in exchange for lighter sentences. Of those, star witness Michael McClinton previously testified that Simpson asked him to bring guns to the hotel room and told him to look "menacing" during the confrontation.

One of the memorabilia dealers tape recorded the scuffle and sold it to TMZ, reportedly for more than $100K. Thomas Riccio's audio tape is expected as key evidence later in the trial. Riccio also profited from an autobiography revealing every "niggly detail" of the hotel scuffle and subsequent proceedings. No doubt a sequel is in the works following issuance of a verdict.

And then there's Clark County District Judge Jackie Glass, the little pistol who could. She initially kept Simpson locked up for arrogance and/or ignorance, later setting bail at $250K. Presiding over the selection of jurors, Glass chided each one saying, "If you think you are going to punish Mr Simpson for what happened in 1995, this is not the case for you."

But not according to Chief Deputy District Attorney Chris Owens. Over objections from defense attorney Yale Galanter, Owens referenced Simpson's infamous murder acquittal, positing,

Ladies and gentlemen, you are the jurors in this case and the final story is going to be told by you. You will be able to write that final chapter, the chapter of arrogance and hypocrisy and that will be the true verdict. The verdict you can feel good about. That's a different case and different facts, but the effect of the judgment is something you may consider.

Talk about impropriety. Thankfully, no request for mistrial ... yet.

Much fuss is being made over the composition of jurors. The nine-woman, three-man panel is composed solely of Caucasians, some with connections to law enforcement. Two African-Americans serve as alternates. Little wonder in a place like Clark County, one of the remaining bastions of good old boy justice.

To top things off, Bruce Fromong, the prosecution's opening witness, second memorabilia dealer, and former Simpson confidant, became unraveled on cross-examination, complained of lightheadedness, and was quickly escorted out of the courtroom. Paramedics examined the multiple heart attack survivor but found nothing amiss. Fromong took the witness stand again this morning, offering little to support the prosecution's case.

No one wants to see fulfillment of justice denied more than I, especially when it comes to O.J. But not an the expense of fundamental rights or principles of fairness and decency.

America prohibits double jeopardy, aka, retrial of the same crime following acquittal. Using subterfuge to circumvent constitutional safeguards makes our justice system look like a three-ring circus and even if somehow gratifying, the audience needs to realize they are the clowns.

Post Oscar Celebrity Legal Briefs

With the glow of Oscars fading in the west, it's reality check time. Oh yes, even the stars have their share of legal woes. Submitted for your approval, a sampling of today's civil matters in the world of entertainment

In the "Here We Go Again" department, Pamela Anderson is seeking an annulment from husband number "I can't keep track anymore" Rick Salomon. Can't imagine why the Baywatch babe is claiming fraud, although what did she expect getting married on a whim?

Jessica Seinfeld's ex, Eric Nederlander, is a two-time loser. He's agreed to vacate the "hate nest" of wife number two just weeks after the birth of their first child. Apparently, Number Two's training as a child psychologist was all for naught.

The sad saga of Britney Spears will remain in state court. An attorney claiming to represent the embattled pop princess tried to move the case to federal court by alleging violation of her constitutional rights. By the time all the lawyers are done picking apart this pie, there may not be much fame and fortune left for her to squander.

The Maccas have been told to clear their calendars for March 17th. That's when a British judge is tenatively scheduled to award Heather Mills a financial settlement in the couple's hotly contested divorce. Sir Paul had hoped to keep the lid on the details, but refused to buckle to m'lady's demands. A public airing of their dirty laundry will likely occur when the judge issues his final ruling.

After having his day in court on charges of defamation, paparazzo Jamie Fawcett was ordered to pay legal fees to the Sun-Herald. A jury found the newspaper liable for defamation, however, the paper called Nicole Kidman as a witness and successfully established it had only reported the truth.
A bank is foreclosing Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. The King of Pop has until March 19th to pay off an overdue balance of about $25M.

Rambo wants revenge. Anthony Pellicano, the private investigator scheduled to go on trial for illegally wiretapping the phones of celebrities, intercepted Sylvester Stallone's private calls in February 2002. Although settled, the interceptions occurred about the same time Stallone sued his former business manager over losses related to the Planet Hollywood restaurant chain.

Alfred Beardsley, the memorabilia dealer caught up in the O.J. Simpson snafu, filed suit against Thomas Riccio, the mastermind behind the Simpson TMZ video. Beardsley is claiming unspecified damages for invasion of privacy, fraud, intentional infliction of emotional distress, and unjust enrichment. In September, 2007, Simpson and friends raided Beardsley's Las Vegas hotel room and seized several items Simpson claimed as his own. Criminal charges remain pending.

The John Ritter wrongful death trial is now in its fourth week. The beloved actor's survivors are suing a cardiologist and radiologist for $67M. Many tearfully testified about Ritter's sudden demise, including then co-star Katey Sagal, son Jason Ritter, and personal assistant Jessica Pilch-Samuel.

Countering a copyright case filed by video game maker Capcom, producers of the Dawn of the Dead films are fighting back. MKR President and chief shareholder Richard Rubinstein believes Capcom's Dead Rising video game is a knock-off of key plot elements in the popular movie franchise.

Producer's of America's Hot Musician, the non-profit organization American Youth Symphony, filed suit against Canadian all-female metal band "Kittie" for $5M. Countering show related threats of legal retaliation, the producers hit back claiming tortious interference with business practices, fraud and libel.

THIS JUST IN:
R.I.P. William F. Buckley, sage political commentator, dead at the age of 82.

Post Valentine's Day Daily Arrested

I don't understand famous people. They have fame. They have money. Why do they do stupid things to screw up their lives? Today's edition of the Daily Arrested:

Chinese actress, Bai Ling, was arrested for shoplifting celebrity magazines and batteries in an airport.

O.J. is back in the news. This time for questioning in connection with the near fatal injuries of his Nicole Brown look-alike girlfriend.

Rapper Terius Gray, aka Juvenile, was arrested for misdemeanor marijuana possession in Jackson, Mississippi.

Having fulfilled all conditions for his 2006 drunken driving arrest, Mel Gibson remains on probation. Let's hope he continues attending AA meetings.

G-Unit rapper Marvin Bernard, aka Tony Yayo, received 10 days of community service as punishment for threatening a recording rival's minor son.

Britney's beau, Adnan Ghalib, was questioned in connection with the assault of a paparazzo.

Redmond O'Neal, son of Ryan O'Neal and Farrah Fawcett, is facing new drug charges after having just completed rehab. His mother, a former Charlie's Angels star, continues to struggle with cancer.

BlogWorld: An Equal Opportunity Random Celebrity Encounter Provider

Las Vegas continues to amaze and delight this small town girl. It's probably one of the few places on the planet where odds of randomly encountering a celebrity increase exponentially relative to the amount of time spent in public gatherings. The caliber and quality of random celebrity encounter, however, is a completely separate matter.

For example, anyone signed up for the Executive and Entrepeneur session of BlogWorld had the option of attending a private screening of The Kite Runner on Wednesday night. Not many did. Don't get me wrong, the event was well attended. It just wasn't a theatre filler. Too bad for the ones who missed out. Celebrity film critic, radio talk show host, political blogger, and all around media entrepeneur Michael Medved acted as master of ceremonies. The organizers didn't publicize Mr. Medved's participation, nor did they dangle the possibility of meeting the film's lead actor, Khalid Abdallah. To say I had my socks knocked off not only by the movie, but also the opportunity to press flesh with these celebs is an understatement. Afterward, Mr. Abdallah and I spoke briefly outside. Very impressive actor who really knows his craft. He's waiting for the next good project to come along. This is a guy who can afford to be choosy.

Last night, BlogWorld hosted a happening party at the Hard Rock Hotel. My chance meeting with celebrity satirist, comedian, Letterman guest, political commentator, and all around funny guy Evan Sayet was definitely a highlight. I'm not too proud to admit, Evan did not immediately register on my celebrity radar. Something about the way he looked me in the eye and said, "Don't you know me?" made me think if I didn't know him, then I certainly should.

We chatted for a while over at the slot machines. When I told Evan I liked to make fun of celebrities, he was a little reluctant to spill about himself. Luckily, I managed to steer the conversation over to politics and family. That's where he began to open up and show his more meaningful side. I don't have enough time this morning to reveal every nook and cranny. Suffice it to say, Evan is a charmer who understands the error of his youth. To sum it up in one sentence, self-indulged Americans of his era refused to acknowledge the tried and true maxim of actions have consequences. I'd say that maxim continues to hold true today, wouldn't you?

Then, there's the mysterious red bus "from Mexico" with continuously running video parked outside the Hard Rock at about 12:30 a.m. I use the quotations because who knows the true origination of this vehicle. A slew of black suited men piled out as I left the casino, leaving the impression of an impending celebrity appearance. I asked one of them who remained inside, but couldn't get a straight answer.

"Just someone from Mehico," was all he would venture in a charming Spanish accent.

"Who?" I anxiously replied. The guy stayed mum and walked away.

Must be someone really big, I imagined. With nothing better to do and no one prodding me along, I decided to stand there and wait -- all night if that's what it took -- to glimpse the big name celeb inside. Needless to say, after 15- 20 minutes, no big name celebrity debarked. In fact, the bus eventually packed up and pulled away. Either the person inside is of such high caliber celebrity they can afford to be completely full of themselves, or I'd just randomly encountered some Mexican show girl too shy to show off her ill-fitting cheap red dress and spiked heels. Either way, the experience left me feeling slightly unfulfilled, like I had just been robbed of some exciting story to tell my eventual grandchildren.
Or not.

Hey, I hear O.J. is in town for the second day of hearings on his armed robbery charges. Hmmmmm. Courthouse or BlogWorld? BlogWorld or the courthouse? Where should I go? For someone as fascinated with all things celebrity, is there really any question?

O.J.'s a hack. Everyone who's anyone is going to BlogWorld. See you people over at the Convention Center.

Sad Saga of O.J. Simpson and Other True Confessions

O.J. Simpson is back in the news, this time for something really bizarre, if that’s even possible. About three weeks prior to the alleged armed robbery that landed him in jail, the FBI blew off warnings about the self-organized sting operation from "O.G.loved One" and his co-conspirator, Thomas Riccio, refusing to take part in another “weird celebrity case.” According to the Jordan Falls News,

|FBI spokeswoman Laura Eimiller said Riccio did not indicate a crime
|would be committed.

So, let me get this straight. The FBI plopped a gob of goo on the laps of Nevada authorities because the idiots who orchestrated this reality TV heist neglected to inform the feds about possible use of force? How exactly did the FBI envision an O.J. confrontation with an alleged memorabilia-stealing wheeler-dealer?

“Hello there. I’m O.J. Simpson. Would you like me to autograph this stuff? Gee, thanks. Now that I’ve got everything I need, I’ll be seeing you around…”?

It’s bad enough the feds sat on intelligence normally channeled to local authorities, but what goads me is their insipid excuse for doing so. That got me thinking about the O.J. saga in general and how this development from another planet is one more miserable notch in the “couldn’t make this stuff up” belt.

Of course, when it comes to making stuff up, O.J. takes top honors. Who else would have the unmitigated gall to pen something as rancid as If I Did It, call it fiction, and expect to profit? I couldn’t bring myself to look at this repackaged tripe and, apparently, neither could a lot of other people. Thankfully, the "O.G.loved One's" ill-advised foray into true crime confession is now #125 on Amazon.com, although I do feel for the Goldman family as the book’s gathering freefall means less sour grapes for the juice.

When the book placed in the top ten, it stood in a class all its own. Nothing from its genre had ever garnered so much attention. In fact, the book paved the way for anyone – group, individual or heir -- wanting to peddle a compelling true story as fiction. I had a strange inkling about a possible literary trend, so I decided to do some digging around. What I uprooted is indeed stranger than fiction. Take a look at the top seven manuscripts rumored for publishing in 2008:

1. If We Perpetrated A Cover Up, by the Warren Commission
Subject: Assassination of President John F. Kennedy.
Summary: Back in the day, before Freedom of Information and the JFK Records Act, there was no need to consider a conspiracy. We could pretty much investigate however we pleased. The development of forensic science was primitive in comparison to today’s methodologies. Also, the lack of meaningful oversight allowed us to omit key information with no immediate consequences. As the months dragged on, it became readily apparent if we reported the destruction of material evidence or numerous irregularities in our own fact-finding mission, then too many “good old boys” would lose their jobs. Blaming a dead man and those bozos in the Secret Service became our ticket out of Dodge.

2. If I Caused It, by Yoko Ono
Subject: The break up of The Beatles.
Summary: John always most talented of that group. But inside, he still insecure like little boy. From minute we meet eyes, John drawn to me, like young butterfly to flowing nectar. I suppose it not hurt I also master of ancient Japanese technique. I plan all those bed-ins, make John my sex slave. Very soon, John do exactly as I say. I say world revolve around us, not mopheads. John take me everywhere, let me deal with cheeky leeches. Everyone fight. Only one sure way to make end.

3. If We Pushed Illegal Drugs To Do Our Dirty Work , by George H.W. Bush
Subject: Ending the counter-culture revolution.
Summary: All those commie subversives from the ‘60s -- Black Panthers, Brown Berets, Cesar Chavez, Martin Luther King, Jr., Young Lords, Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee – they all swore an oath to destroy America. Our secret intelligence tried every known tactic to squelch those vermin. Yet, as fast as we could pick ‘em off, another would take their place. The CIA still denies any involvement in illegal drug trafficking, but it took me less than a year to find out how we were sweeping those pinkos off the streets into the crack houses and prisons where they belonged. Of course, with my political aspirations being what they were, once I caught on, I had to resign my position as Director. Told everyone I needed to spend more time with Babs.

4. If I Erased It, by Rose Mary Woods, as told by her best friend (name withheld upon request)
Subject: The missing Watergate tapes.
Summary: In a desperate attempt to save my career, I purposefully erased about ten minutes of those tapes. Even an average jane secretary knows her boss is going down when he’s reckless enough to record himself disparaging minorities. I swore an oath to Tricky I’d never tell, but seeing as how he resigned, I can’t see the harm now. I immediately stopped erasing when an aid barged through my door. After everyone had left the office for the day, I went back to retrieve an old sweater. There was Tricky, all flustered and sweating like a cow, poor thing. He was desperate to work the erase pedal. I gently tried to show him how, but he stubbornly insisted on doing it himself. Before he could get the hang of it, Pat barged in. She ordered him upstairs. I quickly put on my sweater and left. Heard her saying something about finishing what he started. Never did learn what.

5. If Humans Were Bred With Extraterrestrials , by Paul Bennewitz, as told
by an extremely concerned neighbor (name withheld upon request)
Subject: Area 51.
Summary: They poisoned me, those S.O.B.s, my mind, my water, all my food, everything I hold near and dear. They know it, I know it, and now the whole world will know. They used that off limits base to breed humans with aliens. It’s the only way the United States will remain a world power. When I found out, they implanted a chip in my brain to keep me from blabbing. They know it, I know it, and now the whole world will know. Don’t mind all the crazy drawings posted on my walls. Do you hear voices? I need a cigarette. Will you please make the voices stop? Where’s my cheese?

6. If It Wasn’t An Accident, by Prince Philip
Subject: Death of Princess Diana.
Summary: I always felt responsible for forcing that disastrous marriage, more so when she and poor Charles divorced. Those half naked tabloid pictures with that ghastly Arab, well, that’s what did her in, I’m afraid. As mother of heir to the royal throne, she still had our dignity to maintain. Bett tried to warn her by floating rumors, but the little tart paid no mind. She left the House of Windsor no choice. Putting my brilliant stroke of genius into action was quite easy, really. We knew her itinerary. We had a discreet link inside the DGSE. We set up a ruse for some chap to pose as a photographer. The rest, shall we say, is history. My one regret is Henri. He wasn’t supposed to be on service detail.

7. If Daddy Orchestrated It, by Jenna Bush
Subject: 9/11.
Summary: It’s no secret Daddy used drugs and alcohol to cope with his inadequacies. I’ll be the first to confess, being the do nothing offspring of a powerful man is mucho depress-o. At some point, Mum threatened to leave Daddy unless he sobered up. The next thing I knew, Grandpa and Uncle Dick promised Daddy the White House in return for a whole buncha stuff. Something about that Bin Laden dude and Halliburton. Does Saudi mean anything to y’all? Anyhoo, every who was anyone in the Republican party leaned all over those supreme court robes to sway Daddy’s election. Then, Condi worked out a plan involving stealth planes and missile fire -- still a tad hazy on details – something about increasing Daddy’s ratings in opinion polls to impress Mum. I feel bad innocent people had to die, but I’m sure glad my folks stayed together. Umm. Well. Can y’all excuse me? Henry and I gotta party.

Mess Ups and Dress Ups - A Halloween Filled Foible Review

I've been having a lot of problems with my computer. Not that anyone cares. In trying to get back up to speed, I also noticed a lot of problems in the underbelly of government and entertainment. Hmmm, might make a good feature for the blog, I mused. Ta da. Out of musings, a new feature is born.

1. This nimnall may rank as the dumbest celebrity of all time. Last year, he made more than $500K and pocketed an additional $15K a month in child support, yet his 2006 net earnings total only $7,436.00! In my book, that's either an awful lot of blow, too many sycophants, a need to join shopaholics, or a combination of all three. Maybe he's just a pushover for consumer crazy kids, who knows, but somebody better get hold of this idiot and shake some sense into him...[more]

2. Found a fabulo roundup of Halloween pictures of the rich and famous. Only problem is someone either goofed by including a pix of costumed Christine Aguilera and Jason Bratman from Halloween Past, or that's the best bump camouflaging costume I've ever seen. If the latter, all massively preggers people would be insane not to track down the designer...[more]

3. Looks like Vincent "Don Vito" Margera of Jackass fame got down and dirty in the wrong state at the wrong time. Tsk. Them Colorado folk take their molesting accusations rather seriously, I'd say. Poor Don may be going away for life for something that would have been looked on with a snigger and a wink in good ol' el Lay. Guess that'll teach him where to get lewd and crude. On a side note, what's with the split verdict? Where I come from, it's either all or mistrial. Seems if you're going to send someone away for life, the least your justice system could do is require unanimity...[more]

4. Immigrant Francisco Casteneda got more than he bargained for after being detained by Immigration and Customs officials. But he's going to get even. The bonehead moves of our government never cease to amaze me. I just hope Mr. Casteneda gets the chance to live for his day in court...[more]

5. Perhaps the reality TV blunder of all time, we finally learn about FBI involvement in the O.J. Simpson Vegas sting. What some people will do for money is beyond comprehension. Oh sure. Thomas Riccio got his fifteen minutes and much much more. But was it worth the risk of becoming a convicted felon and forever having his name associated with the most famous celebrity murderer of all time? Call me crazy, but whatever happened to achieving fame the old fashioned way?...[more]

That's a wrap. For now...adieu.