Gywneth Paltrow and Scarlett Johansson Omit Abortion Mention in Campaign for Planned Parenthood

Is Planned Parenthood still on the chopping block? In passing a stopgap measure to avoid a government shutdown, Congressional Republicans dropped their demand to defund the women's health services provider.

Critics attacked the eleventh hour agreement for prohibiting federally funded abortion in the District of Columbia. Many believe this signals a loss of government funding in the final budget. Others believe Planned Parenthood doesn't belong in a funding debate.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Scarlett Johansson want your help in assuring Planned Parenthood's continued funding. They've started a video campaign directing supporters to a page for donations.

Taking care not to mention abortion services as the preventive care Planned Parenthood provides, Paltrow and Johansson emphasize the possible loss of health care services for low-income women. Both focus on STD and cancer screening as services at risk of defunding. Johansson also mentions "access to birth control," but stops short of any reference to abortion.

Do Paltrow and Johansson give a fair account of the issue? Doesn't the public deserve to be reminded that Planned Parenthood provides abortions? Some have also lambasted the organization for lobbying and supporting political candidates. Of course there is no mention of political activity in either video.

I understand pro life sentiments with respect to federal funding of abortion services. Certainly, the issue is an explosive one to many Americans. Yet, maybe because abortion accounts for only 3% of Planned Parenthood services, Paltrow and Johansson didn't think it worth mentioning.

At only 3% of total services and in light of the life-saving care Planned Parenthood provides, I can overlook the partisan politics. Wouldn't total defunding be like throwing the baby out with the bath water?


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Gwen Stefani Gives Birth and Other Mundane Celebrity Gossip

This feature is sometimes known as Mo' Gossip.

Zuma Nesta Rock joins big bro, Kingston James McGregor as the second son of rockers Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale. Stefani gave birth by C-section early Thursday afternoon at Cedars Sinai Medical Hospital in Los Angeles. Although Nesta sounds like a nod to reggae great Bob Marley, the game loving Kingston actually may have helped name the new addition.

"The accusation is dangerous, defamatory and blatantly untrue. Victoria takes her position as a role model to young women very seriously and is horrified by this hurtful, fabricated story." So says Posh Spice's agent Jo Milloy amidst published reports that the diminuitive pop diva and fashion goddess secretly indulges in diet pills smuggled by her sister to stay a slim size zero. Beckham is considering legal action against British tabloid Now Magazine.

Don't get the wrong idea, gossip hounds. Woody Allen ingenue Scarlett Johansson is delaying her marriage to actor Ryan Reynolds until after the presidential election. Twin brother Hunter is so busy working on Barack Obama's campaign, the couple has decided to wait until his calendar is clear.

Fans left The Tyra Banks Show in a huff. The brains behind America's Next Top Model let her audience wait for almost two hours while she shot the breeze with staff and friends behind stage. During the taping she made the audience go outside to release balloons in honor of black models. Seems no one was in much of a mood to comply.

Yep. That's it. Sorry so short, but time constraints on this end. Tune in again for the daily Wrap of Crap.

The George Clooney Curse, Lohan Christian Values, and Other Celebolitic Shorts

This site isn't the only one mixing up politics and celebrities. In today's "Bastard Child," a sampling of mutant celebolitic spawn from around the country.

Does dating George Clooney cause a curse on future hapiness? Yes, according to Britain's Next Top Model judge Lisa Snowden. "It's not something I planned but I just don't get asked out any more. Men seem to look at me and think, 'She went out with George Clooney, what chance have I got?'" The 36-year old model also says her five year on-again-off-again relationship with Clooney hurt her career.

Australian Idol winner Kate DeAraugo won't be hawking diet products on behalf of weight loss conglomerate Jenny Craig. Citing "personal health issues," the break-out star is otherwise mum about the reason for the split.

Actor Richard Dreyfus wants his money back. In a lawsuit filed last Friday against his father and uncle, Dreyfus claims damages of $870,000.

Michael Lohan says his Christian faith would prevent him from giving away famous daughter Lindsay in a gay wedding ceremony. When discussing Lindsay's public love affair with DJ Samantha Ronson, Lohan insists he wants his daughter "to be happy." Guess that Christian faith didn't get in the way of puportedly fathering Lindsay's illegitimate half-sister Ashley.

The "Lonely Loony" aka the "Lusty Lord of the Manor of Warleigh" David Piper, who once advertised for a Lady of the Manor and attracted applications from all around the world, is selling "his whole life" on eBay and hasn't ruled out the possibility of throwing himself into the bargain.

I pity the fool who thinks Mr. T is homophobic. Nevertheless, T pelted a wiggling yellow clad speed walker with candy bars, screaming "You are a disgrace to the man race. It's time to run like a real man" and "Get some nuts!" in a UK Snickers commercial. The ad was pulled after gay rights groups complained.

A dispute over a 1988 film of the late Rodney Dangerfield has been settled. Dangerfield's daughter, Melanie Roy-Friedman, allowed Comedy Central to air the master copy of her father's act without permission from stepmother Joan. Under the terms of settlement all copyrights to Dangerfield's act are held by his widow, Joan Dangerfield.

The upcoming Democratic National Convention promises a roster of stars reading like a Hollywood premiere. Big name celebrities are expected to attend parties hosted by AT&T, MTV, and Rock The Vote. Kanye West, Wyclef Jean, the rap/rock fusion band N.E.R.D., Ben Affleck, Scarlett Johansson, Warren Beatty, Annette Bening, Forrest Whitaker, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Cheryl Hines, and Ed Norton Jr. are just a few of the A-Listers convention spokesman Chris Lopez will neither confirm nor deny are on the guest list.

Can't decide who to vote for in the upcoming presidential election? Why bother with political platforms when pop culture icons might influence the vote? John McCain favors Batman, ABBA, Roy Orbison, Linda Ronstadt, Usher, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Seinfeld, Dexter, Indian Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, and Dennis Hasbert in 24. Barack Obama favors Batman, Spiderman, Frank Sinatra, Bob Dylan, Sheryl Crow, John Coltrane, M*A*S*H, The Dick Van Dyke Show, Shrek the Third, and Jeff Bridges in The Contender.

Scarlett Johansson Opens Cannes of Worms

Scarlett Johansson needs to stick a pin in it. Her head must be the size of a watermelon. Seriously, she of luscious lips blew a good thing big time. Must have thought old Woodykins, was paying the freight.

Scarjo's hotel, transportation, and makeup demands so enraged the French Branch of Warner Brothers Films, executives left her in New York rather than fly her to Cannes. Too bad because the crowd adored her latest Woody Allen film, Vicky Christina Barcelona. Co-stars Penelope Cruz and Rebecca Hall basked in a ten minute standing ovation alone. Afterwards, they and the Woodman partied like there was no tomorrow.

No one missed Johansson, according to one prominent New York socialite. Ouch. That's gotta sting.

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Celebrity Endorsements Continue to Litter 2008 Election Trail

Are they still counting the votes in California? The local rag sent out an early edition marking the star studded state undecided. Thankfully, it now makes updates via the Internet.

I wonder how technology resistant and financially challenged people get their news? Certainly not at the public library, at least not in the "City That (supposedly) Reads."

Still too close to call for the Democrats. Wow. For the first time I can remember (actually, for the first time since I started to care), a Maryland primary is going to matter. I wonder if the campaigns will send celebrities. The state is, after all, bright blue.

I for one would drop everything if George Clooney took a detour into town. Yes, Gorgeous George can count on my vote for Obama, but only if I get to take a cell phone picture with my arms wrapped around his well-tailored waist (must keep eyes peeled for hastily scheduled appearances on campaign trail). Too bad he left that U.N. thingee in Manhattan, although can't say I blame him. Clooney arrived directly from a technical assessment mission in Sudan only to be excluded from a meeting of power players. Luckily, he did manage to get a word in edgewise. Way to go, George! Hunky and tenacious. Is it any wonder he sets hearts aflutter?

Of course, the stars had no problem turning out in California and the Tri-State Area. There were so many, it's kinda difficult to keep tabs. Then again, a CNN camera crew had no problem at all.

Let's see, Jack, Laura Linny, and Spielberg, for She-Who-Should-Not-Be-Named. Scarlett, De Niro, and California First Lady for Obama. Just a sampling of the new endorsements rolling down the pike. It would take all day to flesh out every single one. Not that I am in any way influenced by these high profile preferences. No one should be. I'm just psyched by the possibility of catching me some glitterati.

On primary day, celebrities head for the polls just like other civic minded individuals. Along the way, entertainment correspondents vie for attention. Much like exit polls, voters need to digest these celebrity sound bites with a grain of salt. Like everyone else, celebrities pull the lever, punch the chad, or touch the screen in complete secrecy, free from extraneous control and the prying eyes of correspondents. Unless they're flashing their notoriety on the campaign trail, no one really knows which candidate they support.

And isn't that part of what makes America great?